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演讲
怎样的人生更有意义？这里有
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在日渐浮躁的今天我们不盲从、不封闭、不恶意评判用
TED
开阔视野
There's more to life
than being happyTED
简介：
2017 |
活中我们是不能只有乏味和痛苦的，
需要不断
< br>追求快乐，人生才有意思。但是这个世界似乎总是无法满足
追求快乐的人，这是为
什么？作家艾米丽·史密斯（
Emily
Smith
）女士来到
TED
演讲，提出了几点建议，告诉
大家怎
样的人生才有意义。演讲者：
Emily Smith<
/p>
片长：
12
：
0
6
只
看英文字幕视频点阅读原文
中英对照翻译
I used to think the
whole purpose of lifewas
pursuing
happiness. Everyone said the path to happiness
was success, so Isearched for that
ideal job, that perfect
boyfriend, that
beautiful instead of ever
feeling
fulfilled, I felt anxious and adrift. And I
wasn'talone;
my friends -- they
struggled with this, too.
我以前认为人生
的目标就是追求快乐。人人都说，成功是通往快乐的路，所
以我去寻找理想的工
作、完美的男友、漂亮的公寓。但我没
有感到圆满，反而觉得焦虑跟漫无目的。且不只有
我这样；
我的朋友们──他们也有这种困扰。
Eventually, I decided to go to
graduateschool for positive
psychology
to learn what truly makes people happy. But
whatI discovered there changed my life.
The data showed
that chasing happiness
canmake people unhappy. And
what really
struck me was this: the suicide rate hasbeen
rising around the world, and it
recently reached a 30-year
high in
America.
我最后决定去研究所读正向心理学，去找
出
什么能让人开心。但我在那儿的发现，改变了我的人生。
数据显示，
追求快乐会让人不快乐。
真正让我震惊的是这点：
全球的自
杀率不断攀升，最近在美国达到三十年来的新高。
Even
though life is getting objectively better by
nearly
every conceivablestandard, more
people feel hopeless,
depressed and
alone. There's an emptinessgnawing away
at people, and you don't have to be
clinically depressed to
feelit. Sooner
or later, I think we all wonder: Is this all there
is? And accordingto the research, what
predicts this
despair is not a lack of
happiness. It's alack of something
else, a lack of having meaning in life.
虽然客观来说，
生活变
好了，从每个能
想到的标准来看皆是如此，却有更多人感到
无助、沮丧、及孤独。有一种空虚感在侵蚀人
们，并不需被
临床诊断出沮丧也能感觉到这个现象。我想，迟早我们都会
想要知道：难道就只有这样而已吗？根据研究，绝望的原因
并不是缺乏快乐，而
是缺乏某样东西，是缺乏人生意义。
But that
raised some questions for me. Isthere more to life
than being happy? And what's the
difference between
beinghappy and
having meaning in life? Many
psychologists define happiness as
astate of comfort and
ease, feeling
good in the moment. Meaning, though,
isdeeper.
但这就让我产生了一些问题。难道人生不
只是要
快乐吗？活得快乐和活得有意义之间有什么差别？许多心
理学家把快乐定义为一种舒服自在的状态，在当下感觉很好。
而意义则更深。
The renowned psychologist Martin
Seligman says
meaning comes
frombelonging to and serving something
beyond yourself and from developing the
bestwithin you.
Our culture is obsessed
with happiness, but I came to see
thatseeking meaning is the more
fulfilling path. And the
studies show
that peoplewho have meaning in life, they're
more resilient, they do better in
school andat work, and
they even live l
onger.
知名心理学家马丁赛里格曼说，
意义来
自归属感、致力于超越自我之外的事物，以及从内在发展出
最好的自己。我
们的文化对「快乐」相当痴迷，但我发现，
寻找意义才是更让人满足的道路。且研究指出
，有人生意义
的人适应力也会比较强，他们在学校及职场的表现较佳，他
们甚至活得比较久。
So this all
made me wonder: How can we eachlive more
meaningfully? To find out, I spent five
years interviewing
hundredsof people
and reading through thousands of
pages
of psychology, neuroscienceand philosophy.
Bringing it all together, I found that
there are what I callfour
pillars of a
meaningful life. And we can each create lives of
meaning bybuilding some or all of these
pillars in our lives.
所以这一切让我开始想，我们每个人要如
何活得有意义？为
了找出答案，我花了五年时间，访谈了数百人，阅读了数千
页的心理学、神经科学、及哲学。把这些汇整起来，我发现
了一件事，我称
之为「人生意义的四大支柱」
。我们可以彼
此相互建立起这些支
柱，在彼此的人生中找到人生的意义。
The first
pillar is belonging. Belongingcomes from being in
relationships where you're valued for
who you
areintrinsically and where you
value others as well. But
some groups
andrelationships deliver a cheap form of
belonging; you're valued for what
youbelieve, for who you
hate, not for
who you are. True belonging springs fromlove.
It lives in moments among individuals,
and it's a choice --
you canchoose to
cultivate belonging with others.
第一根支
柱是归属感。归属感来自于一种关系，一种你与他人在本质
上彼此是否
处在相互珍惜的关系中。但有些群体或关系，提
供的是廉价形式的归属感；你被重视的原
因是因为你所相信
的事物、你对人的好恶、而不是你的本质。真正的归属感源
自于爱。它存在于个体间共处的时光当中，且它是一种选择
──你可以选择
与他人培养归属感。
Here's an example.
Each morning, my friendJonathan
buys a
newspaper from the same street vendor in New
York. They don'tjust conduct a
transaction, though. They
take a moment
to slow down, talk, andtreat each other like
humans. But one time, Jonathan didn't
have the
rightchange, and the vendor
said, 'Don't worry about it.' But
Jonathaninsisted on paying, so he went
to the store and
bought something he
didn't needto make change. But
when he
gave the money to the vendor, the vendor drew
was hurt. He was trying to do
something kind, but
Jonathan had
rejected him.
举例来说，每天早晨，我在纽约
的
朋友强纳森都会向同一个街头小贩买一份报纸。不过，他
们并不是只有交易的关系。
他们会停下来，
花点时间说说话，
把彼此当
朋友对待。
但有一次，
强纳森的零钱不够，
小贩说：
「没关系不用了啦。
」但强纳森坚持要付钱，所以
他去一家
店，买了他不需要的东西，把钞票找开。但当他把钱给小贩
时，小贩退缩了。他感到受伤。他试着想表现友好，但强纳
森拒绝了他。
I think we all reject people in
small wayslike this without
realizing
it. I do. I'll walk by someone I know and
barelyacknowledge them. I'll check my
phone when
someone's talking to me.
These actsdevalue others. They
make
them feel invisible and unworthy. But when you
leadwith love, you create a bond that
lifts each of you up.
我想，我们都曾像这样在小地方拒绝别人
却没有意识到。我
就有过。我会从认识的人旁边走过，却没跟他们打招呼。当
有人在跟我说话时，我会看手机。这类行为是在贬低别人的
价值，让他们觉
得自己是隐形的、不值得的。但若用爱来引
导，你就会创造出一种联结，让你们彼此都振
奋起来。
For many people,
belonging is the mostessential source of
meaning, those bonds to family and
friends. For others,
thekey to meaning
is the second pillar: purpose. Now,
finding your purpose is notthe same
thing as finding that
job that makes
you happy. Purpose is less aboutwhat you
want than about what you give. A
hospital custodian told
me herpurpose
is healing sick people. Many parents tell
me, 'My purpose israising my children.'
The key to purpose
is using your
strengths to serveothers.
对很多人来说，
归属
感是人生意义的重要来源，就是与家人及朋友之间的联结。
对其他人来说，第二根人生意义的支柱是目的。找到你的目
的并不是指找到让
你快乐的工作。目的的重点是你能给予什
么，而不是你想要什么。一位医院管理员告诉我
，她的目的
是治愈生病的人。很多家长告诉我：
「我的目的是扶
养我的
孩子。
」目标的关键在于用你的力量去服务他人。
Of course, for many of us,
that happens through work.
That's how
wecontribute and feel needed. But that also
means that issues like disengagementat
work,
unemployment, low labor force
participation -- these aren't
justeconomic problems, they're
existential ones, too.
Without
something worthwhileto do, people flounder. Of
course, you don't have to find purpose
at work, butpurpose
gives you something
to live for, some 'why' that drives
you
forward.
当然，对很多人而言，这是透过工作来达成的。
那是我们做出贡献和感到被需要的方式。但这也意味着，像
是无心工作、失业、低劳动
参与率等等议题──这些不仅是经
济问题，也是存在主义问题。人们若没有值得去做的事
，就
会挣扎折腾。当然，你不需要从工作中找到目的，但目的能
让你有活下去的意义，有驱使你向前行的「理由」
。
The third pillar of meaning is also
aboutstepping beyond
yourself, but in a
completely different way:
endent states
are those rare
moments when you're
lifted above the hustleand bustle of
daily life, your sense of self fades
away, and you feel
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