-
I
Have
His
Ear
in
My
Pocket
Ivan
came
home
with
a
bloody
nose
and
his
mother
asked,
happened?
< br>
kid
bit
me,
replied
Ivan.
you
recognize
him
if
you
saw
him
again?
asked
his
mother.
know
him
any
where,
said
Ivan.
have
his
ear
in
my
pocket.
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问,
“
发生了什么事
?
”
“
一个
男孩咬了我一口,
”
伊凡说。
“
再见到他你能认出来吗?
”
妈妈问。
“
他走到哪里我都能认出他,
”
伊凡说。
“
他的耳朵还在我
衣
兜里呢?
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
A
Good
Boy
Little
Robert
asked
his
mother
for
two
cents.
did
you
do
with
the
mon
ey
I
gave
you
yesterday?
gave
it
to
a
poor
old
woman,
he
answered.
re
a
good
boy,
said
the
mother
proudly.
are
two
cents
more.
But
why
are
you
so
interested
in
the
old
woman?
is
the
one
who
sells
the
candy.
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“
昨天给你的钱干什么了?
”
“
我给了一个可怜的老太婆,
”
他回
答说。
“
你真是个好孩子,
”
妈妈骄傲地
说
“
再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感
兴趣呢?
“
她是个卖糖果的。
”
Hospitality
The
hostess
apologized
to
her
unexpected
guest
for
serving
an
apple-pie
wit
hout
any
cheese.
The
little
boy
of
the
family
left
the
room
quietly
for
a
mom
ent
and
returned
with
a
piece
of
cheese
which
he
laid
on
the
guest's
plate.
T
he
visitor
smiled,
put
the
cheese
into
his
mouth
and
then
said:
must
ha
ve
better
eyes
than
your
mother,
sonny.
Where
did
you
find
the
cheese?
the
rat-trap,
sir,
replied
theboy.
由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时,
家里没有
奶酪了,
于是女主人向大家表示歉意。
这家的小男孩悄
悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿,他拿着一片奶酪回到房间,把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。
客
人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说:
“
孩子,
你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。
你在哪里找到的奶酪?
”
“
在捕鼠夹上,先生。
”
那小男孩说。好
客
面试人员给一位前来应征的男士一张履历表,于是就填了这
样的信息
——
姓名:
English
or
Chinese
□
英文的还是中文的?
年龄:
Confidential
(这是私人问题)
身高:
Not
related
to
the
job
(这跟工作有关系么)
体重:
Varies
all
the
time
before
lunch
or
after
(随时改变饭前饭后都不同
居住地:
At
what
stage
of
my
life
please
be
more
specific
(那是一
个特别的地方,
我生命的舞台)
电话
:
Ericsson
(爱立信手机)
电子邮件:
Only
give
to
pretty
and
rich
girls
(只留给漂亮和
富有的女孩)
上班时间:
The
shorter
the
better
(越短越好)
应征职位:
A
position
that
has
not
much
to
do
but
surround
by
pretty
and
you
ng
girls
(找一个不做什么实事,但能被美女包围的职位)
学历:
Graduated
at
the
wild
chicken
university
(毕业于一个你找不着的大学
语言能力:
Fluent
in
bullshits
(侃大山是专长)
兴趣:
Sleeping
and
sleeping
(睡得天昏地暗)
生日:正月初七
经历:
Fooling
around
all
the
time
(游戏人生)
曾任职位:
Decent
or
not
decent
□
please
be
more
specific<
/p>
(高级的或者低级的都是
一种经历)
已婚未婚:
Still
looking
for
a
rich
and
beautiful
girl
□
hopefully
can
find
in
your
c
ompany
(我正在寻找漂亮又富有的女孩,希望在你们公司能找到
未来期望:
Have
a
speech
on
stage
and
retire
as
soon
as
possible<
/p>
(只负责主席台
讲话,并且希望尽早退休)
希望待遇:
Lesser
workload
the
bett
er
(比实际工作量拿得多就行
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