雅思大作文Academic Writing 评分标准+首段写法+主体段写法

Academic Writing

Task 2

IELTS Writing

Task2

评分标准解析

?

Band 8 description

–

Task Response

?

Length

?

Address all questions directly

?

Clear position and well developed

–

Coherence and Cohesion

?

Cohesive devices

?

Clear progression

?

Clear central topic

–

Lexical Resource

?

Use a wide range of vocabulary

?

Skillfully use uncommon items

?

Error free

–

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

?

Use a wide range of structures

?

Error free

Task2

评分标准解析

?

LR

得分对策

?

避免口语词汇

?

always; very; a lot of

?

避免表意不明

?

new things; bad things

?

避免使用使役动词

?

make sth adj.

?

避免意译

?

starting places; cut out

Writing Task 2

分类突破

?

雅思写作话题分类

–

R

eport

【报告型】

?

Reasons

?

Influences

?

Measures

–

A

rgumentation

【论证型】

?

Opinions

?

Evidences

首段写法

?

贫富差距：

–在当今社会，

贫富差距很普遍并且越来越明显。

这种状况如果得不到有效的解

决将会给社会带来各种问题。

本文将探讨贫富差距产生的原因并提出相应 的解

决方案。

?

国际旅游

–当前，

出国旅游现在已经非常普遍并且人们在旅游过程中了解 的异国文化。

这

种国家之间的了解对国际关系将产生重大影响。

本文将探讨国际旅游受欢迎的

主要原因以及对个人与社会的影响 。

?

环境污染：

–在

21

世纪，人类面临着严峻的环境问题。这个问题如果没有得到有效的控制，

会威胁人类的生存。

在本文中，

我将探讨环境 污染的主要原因并提出有效的解

决方案。

首段写法

?

贫富差距：

–

In the contemporary societies, the gap between the rich and the poor is

prevalent and becoming increasingly obvious. If this situation is not

addressed effectively, it will give rise to a variety of social problems. In

this essay. I will look into the reasons for the wealth gap and bring forth

corresponding solutions.

首段写法

?

国际旅游

–

In recent years, international travel has been increasingly popular across

the world and the tourists learn about the distinctive cultures from their

own

through traveling. Such understanding between people has

significantly affected the international relations. In this essay, I will

investigate about the reason for increase of international tourists and

analyze the effects on individuals and the society.

首段写法

?

环境问题

–

In the 21st century, the human race is facing grave environmental

condition than any previous times. If the trend is not reversed, the

survival of human being will be in risk. In this essay, I will elaborate on

the causes of environmental damages and put forward corresponding

solutions.

首段写法

?

贫富差距：

–

在当今社会，

贫富差距很普遍并且越来越明显。

这种状况如果 得不到有效的解

决将会给社会带来各种问题。

本文将探讨贫富差 距产生的原因并提出相应的解

决方案。

?

国际旅游

–

当前，

出国旅游现在已经非常普遍并 且人们在旅游过程中了解的异国文化。

这

种国家之间的了解对国 际关系将产生重大影响。

本文将探讨国际旅游受欢迎的

主要原因 以及对个人与社会的影响。

?

环境污染：

–

在

21

世纪，人类面临着严峻的环境问题。这个问题如果没有 得到有效的控制，

会威胁人类的生存。

在本文中，

我将探讨环境污染的主要原因并提出有效的解

决方案。

首段写法

–

According to one recent survey

, the number of private cars in

Beijing has increased by 20% to 2 million and

it is difficult to

foresee any downward trend

.

–

THESIS STATEMENT

–

This ever-swelling car ownership

in many big cities as well as

countryside is causing

numerous problems

.

–

It

is

reported

that

the

world

is

facing

a

worsening

youth

employment crisis: young people are three times more likely to

be

unemployed

than

adults

and

over

75

million

youth

worldwide are looking for work.

–

THESIS STATEMENT

–

The

impacts

of

the

situation

should

be

given

adequate

attention.

–

Proving surprising facts: statistics

–

According

to

a

recent

survey,

more

than

70%

of

the

……

–

It is reported that ......

–

An

authoritative

magazine

concerning

…

reveals

that

…

–

In

a

study

conducted

by

the

Medical

Association,

researchers concluded that

…

–

Practice:

–

The dying out of species

–

Surprising statement: from experts or researches

–

…, as educationalists suggests / points out /

advises

–

Studies have shown that / proven that

…

–

… (facts) …. Some experts draw the conclusion

that

……

?

Practice:

–

Noise pollution

–

Long

term

exposure

in

noise

could

lead

to

serious

physical

disorders

or

even

fatal

disease,

as

medical

experts

advises

/

cautions / suggests.

–

THESIS STATEMENT

–

They also prompt the government to identify the sources of

noise and to take effective actions to reduce noise.

–

Noise

pollution

adversely

affects

the

lives

of

millions

of

people. Studies have shown

that there are direct links between

noise

and

health.

Problems

related

to

noise

include

hearing

loss, sleep disruption, low productivity and so on, among which

Hearing Loss is the most common.

–

THESIS STATEMENT

–

These

health

hazards

can

only

be

eliminated

though

identifying the main sources and the measures to reduce noises.

?

Sample:

–

In recent decades, an increasing number of museums and

galleries have been built in my countries, most of which are

equipped with the latest technology and advanced facilities. What

is the function of such places and who should be responsible for

financing such places?

?

Most teens have money to spend thanks to an allowance

or after-school job, but do they have the money

management skills to go along with that income?

Therefore some people suggest that we should teach

children about financial management at an early age.

?

It is known to all that noise can be annoying, but are you

aware of the fact that the impacts of noise on our

health can be appalling?

THESIS STATEMENT

To alleviate the hazardous effects, it is critical to identify

the main sources of noise and take necessary

measures to reduce noise pollution.

?

?

?

素材梳理：

–

[C7T3 Page 167] WRITING TASK 2

–

As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work,

job

satisfaction

is an important element of individual wellbeing.

–

What factors contribute to job satisfaction?

–

How realistic is the expectoration of job satisfaction for all workers?

Report

主体段结构

?

考官范文赏析：

–

Body 1

?

“Employees get job satisfaction

in a number of ways.

”

–

Firstly

, feel the work is valued and valuable and feel the job is

worth doing

–

Secondly

, a sense of progression

–

The sense of belonging

also

contribute to …

–

Satisfaction is

also

increased by a sense of responsibility

Report

主体段结构

?

素材梳理：

–

[

环境资源类

] Far too little has been done to prevent animals and

plants from dying out, although people have noticed this problem for a

long time. Why are people failed to improve this situation? What are

your suggestions?

Report

主体段结构

?

素材梳理：

–

Page 228 Reasons and solutions for juvenile crime.

Report

主体段结构

?

素材梳理：

–

Page 246 Reasons and solutions to water shortage

Report

主体段结构

?

素材组织：

–

[

环境资源类

] Far too little has been done to prevent animals and

plants from dying out, although people have noticed this problem for a

long time. Why are people failed to improve this situation? What are

your suggestions?

Report

主体段结构

?

素材组织（平民版）：

–

首

先

?

First of all; to begin with; first

–

其

次

?

In addition; besides; in addition to

–

再

次

?

Moreover; wh

at’s more

Report

主体段结构

?

素材组织（砖家版）：

–

Reasons [

主要次要；直接间接

]

?

一个主要原因是

–

T

he major / main / prime cause

is that …

?

另一个因素是

–

T

he other contributing factor

involves

…

?

….

也不能被忽略

–

I

n addition, …

should not be ignored

Report

主体段结构

?

素材组织（砖家版）：

–

Measures [

有效性

]

?

一个有效解决方案是

…

?

One effective approach

to solve the problem is …

?

此外，

…

也是一个可行的选择。

?

Besides, to do … is

also a feasible choice.

?

如果能

…,

问题也能得到极大的解决

?

Provided that

… can be done, this issue

could be

largely improved.

Report

主体段结构

?

素材组织（专家版）：

Report

主体段结构

?

素材组织（专家版）：

–

The first reason is associated with the mass media, whether it is

print media such as newspaper or magazine or the electronic

media including the internet or TV, where the readers or

audiences are bombarded with fashionable content.

–

However, whether to buy something fashionable is ultimately

determined by we individuals, or more exactly, consumers.

–

Therefore, some consideration should be given to the buyer

themselves.

Report

主体段结构

?

素材组织（专家版）：

Report

主体段结构

?

素材组织（专家版）：

–

Many people suggest that the failure of family education may be

to blame.

–

Due to the fact that young children spent the major part of time in

school

–

educationalists also point out that there is a problem with school

education as well.

Report

主体段结构

?

素材组织（专家版）：

–

To reduce juvenile crime, first of all, parents should regulate

children’s behavior and instill correct view of life.

–

Though educating about right and wrong can reduce crime in the

long run, to halt the current trend of juvenile crime, children

should develop clear recognition about the consequences of

inappropriate behaviors, where schools are in the best position to

implement the solution.

–

Schools should incorporate legal education into the elementary

curriculum.

Report

主体段结构

?

素材组织（专家版）：

–

C8 Page 167 solution to traffic and pollution

–

I think to tackle the problem of pollution, cleaner fuels

need to be developed. …

–

However, traffic congestion will not be solved by

changing the type of private vehicle people can use. To

do this, we need to improve the choice of public transport

services available to travellers.

…

Task 2

论据扩展方法

?

论据扩展：

–

[

环境资源类

] Far too little has been done to prevent animals and

plants from dying out, although people have noticed this problem for a

long time. Why are people failed to improve this situation? What are

your suggestions?

Task 2

主体段落扩展

?

主体段落论据扩展：

–

The main reason is that a large proportion of people lack

the awareness of protecting the endangered species.

Task 2

主体段落扩展

?

主体段落论据扩展：

–

The main reason is that a large proportion of people lack

the awareness of protecting the endangered species.

?

Why so?

【给出原因】

?

Really?

【给出具体事例】

Task 2

主体段落扩展

?

主体段落论据扩展：

–

the main reason is that a large proportion of people lack the

awareness of protecting the endangered species.

?

[

解释原因

] Many people assume that there is no direct relation beween

the living of those plants and animals and ours.

?

[

解释后果

] As a result, people seldom see the necessity and the

significance to invest heavily on protection, due to which many species

become extinct.

Task 2

主体段落扩展

?

主体段落论据扩展：

–

The other contributing factor involves the economic development.

–

[

解释原因

] Economic growth is invariably accompanied by taking resources

from the nature such as cutting down woods in the forest, and discharging

waste and pollutant into the nature.

–

[

解释后果

] In this process, the habitats of many species are destroyed.

–

[

举例说明

] Taking chemical industry for example, as it contributes to the

overall national economy, the toxic water and other substances, which were

discharged without being treated, have been the main cause of extinction of

some aquatic lives.

Task 2

主体段落扩展

?

主体段落论据扩展：

–

People tend to give priority to economic development rather than species

conservation.

–

[

解释原因

] Generally speaking, ecomomic benefits are the primary concern

of people, while protecting endangered species demands tremendous

amount of resources and produced limited values.

–

[

解释后果

]Accordingly, being confronted with the choices, most would

choose to develop the economy at the expenses of some species.

Task 2

主体段落扩展

?

主体段落论据扩展：

–

To improve the current situation, the government need to

launch educational program to inform the public about

the significance of protecting endangered species.

–

How to do that?

【

C8T3

】

–

Is that effective?

Task 2

主体段落扩展

?

主体段落论据扩展：

–

For example, schools can open courses concerning

environmental protection, and the government can

broadcast educational contents through the mass media

to the public. In this way, people will becoming increasing

aware of

the living condition of endangered species

and take necessary actions.

Task 2

主体段落扩展

?

论点表述：

–

[20081023] Many people use distance-learning programs (study

material post

，

TV< /p>

，

internet etc.) to study at home

，

but some people

think that it can not bring the benefit as much as attending

college or university.

–

Discuss both views and gives your opinion.

?

远程学习

?

上大学（在学校学习）

?

讨论双方观点并给出自己的观点

Task 2

主体段落扩展

?

[Task 2

真题练习

]

–

Many people use distance- learning programs (study material post

，

TV

，

internet etc.) to study at home

，

but some people think that it can

not bring the benefit as much as attending college or university.

–

Discuss both views and gives your opinion.

Task 2

主体段落扩展

?

[Task 2

真题练习

]

–

[TS]

One obvious advantage for students going to

university is that

studying in university may contribute

to enhancing the students’ communicative abilities.

?

在学校学习一个最大的优势在于

…

?

大学学习

对

提高学生的交流能力

有益

。