哈利波特1的台词

2021年2月12日发(作者：sunny)

HARRY PORTER AND THE SORCERER'S STONE

Transcribed by Joydrop143

joydrop143@

DUMBLEDORE

I should've known you would have been

here Professor McGonagall.

MCGONAGALL

Good evening Professor Dumbledore. Are

the rumors true Albus?

DUMBLEDORE

I'm afraid so Professor. The good and

the bad.

MCGONAGALL

And the boy?

DUMBLEDORE

Hagrid is bringing him.

MCGONAGALL

Do you think it wise to trust Hagrid

w/ something as important as this?

DUMBLEDORE

Ah, Prof. I would trust Hagrid w/ my

life

HAGRID

Professor. Dumbledore, sir. Professor

McGonagall.

DUMBLEDORE

No problems I trust Hagrid?

HAGRID

No, sir. Little tyke fell asleep as

we were flying over Bristol. Try not

to wake him. There you go.

MC

Albus, do really think it's safe leaving

him with these people? I've watched

them all day. There're the worst sort

of Muggles imaginable. They really are-

-

DUMBLEDORE

The only family he has.

MCGONAGALL

This boy will be famous. There won't

be a child in our world who doesn't

know his name.

DUMBLEDORE

Exactly. He's far better off growing

up away from all of that. Until he is

ready. There, there Hagrid. It's not

really goodbye after all. Good Luck,

Harry Potter.

- - - -

AUNT PETUNIA

Up. Get up! Now!

DUDLEY

Wake up cousin! We're going to the zoo!

AUNT PETUNIA

Here he comes the birthday boy!

UNCLE VERNON

happy birthday son.

AUNT PETUNIA

Why don't you just cook the breakfast

and try not to burn anything.

HARRY

Yes Aunt Petunia.

AUNT PETUNIA

I want everything to be perfect for

my Dudley's special day!

UNCLE VERNON

Hurry up! Bring my coffee boy!

HARRY

yes Uncle Vernon.

AUNT PETUNIA

Aren't they wonderful darling?

DUDLEY

How many are there?

VOLDEMORT

36, Counted them myself.

DUDLEY

36?! BUT LAST YEAR LAST YEAR I HAD 37!!!

VOLDEMORT

Yes, but some of them are a bit bigger

than last year's!

DUDLEY

I don't care how big they are!

AUNT PETUNIA

Now, now, now, this is what we're going

to do. Is that when we go out we're

going to buy you 2 new presents. How's

that pumpkin?

AUNT PETUNIA

It should be a lovely day at the zoo.

I'm really looking forward to it.

VOLDEMORT

I'm warning you now boy. Any funny business,

any at all and you won't have any meals

for a week. Get in.

DUDLEY

Make it move.

VOLDEMORT

Move.

DUDLEY

MOVE!

HARRY

He's asleep.

DUDLEY

He's boring.

HARRY

Sorry about him he doesn't understand

what it's like, lying there day after

day watching people press their ugly

faces in on you. Can you hear me? It's

just I've never talked to a snake before.

Do you... Do you talk to people often?

You're from Burma, aren't you? Was it

nice there? Did you miss your family?

I see. That's me as well. I never knew

my parents either.

DUDLEY

Mummy, Dad, come here you won't believe

what this snake is doing! Woah! Woah!

Ah!

SNAKE

Thanks.

HARRY

Any time.

OTH

Snake! Ahh!

DUDLEY

Mum! Mummy! Help me!

PERCY

My darling boy! How did you get in there!

Who did this? How did you get in there?

Is there a snake?

- - - -

PERCY

It's all right sweetheart. We'll get

you out of these terrible clothes.

VOLDEMORT

What happened?

HARRY

I swear, I don't know! One minute the

glass was there then it was gone, it

was like magic!

VOLDEMORT

There's no such thing as magic.

VOLDEMORT

Oh Marge is ill. Ate a funny whelk.

DUDLEY

Dad! Look! Harry's got a letter!

HARRY

Hey give it back! It's mine!

VOLDEMORT

Yours? Who'd be writing to you?

VOLDEMORT

No more mail through this letterbox.

AUNT PETUNIA

Have a lovely day at the office, dear.

VOLDEMORT

Shoo! Go on!

VOLDEMORT

Fine day Sunday. In my opinion best

day of the week. And why is that Dudley?

HARRY

Because there's no post on Sundays.

VOLDEMORT

Right you are Harry. No post on Sunday.

Ha! No blasted letters today! No, sir!

Not one single bloody letter! Not one!

No sir, not one blasted, miserable-

-

DUDLEY

Make it stop, please!

VOLDEMORT

Stop it!

DUDLEY

Mummy what's happening?

VOLDEMORT

Give me that! Give me that letter!

HARRY

Get off! They're my letters! Let go

of me!

VOLDEMORT

That's it! We're going away, far away!

Where they can't find us!

DUDLEY

Daddy's gone mad hasn't he?

- - - -

HARRY

Make a wish, Harry.

VOLDEMORT

Who's there?

HAGRID

Sorry 'bout that.

VOLDEMORT

I demand that you leave at once. You

are breaking and entering.

HAGRID

Dry up Dursley you great prune. Well,

I haven't seen you since you was a baby

Harry. But you're a bit more along then

I would have expected; particularly

around the middle.

DUDLEY

I'm not... I'm not Harry.

HARRY

I am.

HAGRID

Well of course you are! Got something

for you. Afraid I might have sat on

it at some point but I imagine it'll

taste fine just the same. Baked it myself,

words and all.

HARRY

Thank you!

HAGRID

It's not everyday your young man turns

11 now it is?

HARRY

Excuse me, but who are you?

HAGRID

Rubeus Hagrid, Keeper of Keys and Grounds

at Hogwarts. Of course you know all

about Hogwarts

HARRY

Sorry, no.

HAGRID

No? Blimey Harry didn't you ever wonder

didn't you ever wonder how your mum

and dad learned it all?

HARRY

Learned what?

HAGRID

You're a wizard Harry.

HARRY

I'm a what?

HAGRID

A wizard. And a thumpin' good one I'd

wager once you've trained up a bit.

HARRY

No, you've made a mistake. I mean I

can't be a wizard... I mean I'm Harry,

Just Harry.

HAGRID

Well,

anything happen? Anything you couldn't

explain, when you were angry or scared?

Um Hum.

HARRY

Dear Mr. Potter, we are pleased to inform

you that you have been accepted at the

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

VOLDEMORT

He will not be going! We swore when

we took him in that we would put a stop

to all of this rubbish!

HARRY

You knew? We knew all along and you

never told me?

AUNT PETUNIA

Of course we knew. How could you not

be? My perfect being who she was. Oh

I remember the day she got her letter.

My parents were so proud. We have a

witch in the family. Isn't it wonderful?

I was the only one who saw her for what

she was... a freak. And then she met

that Potter, and then she had you and

I knew you would be the same just as

strange just as abnormal. And then,

if you please, she got herself blown

up, and we got landed with you.

HARRY

Blown up?! You told me my parents died

in a car crash!

HAGRID

A car crash? A car crash killed Lily

and James Potter?

PAT

We had to say something!

HAGRID

It's an outrage. It's a scandal.

VOLDEMORT

He will not be going.

HAGRID

Oh and I suppose a great Muggle like

yourself is gonna stop him.

HARRY

Muggle?

HAGRID

Non- magic folk. This boy's had his

name down since he were born. He's going

to the finest school of witchcraft and

wizardry in the world. And he'll be

under the finest headmaster that Hogwarts

has ever seen, Albus Dumbledore...

VOLDEMORT

I will not pay to have some crack pot

old fool teach him magic tricks!

HAGRID

Never insult Albus Dumbledore in front

of me... I'd appreciate it if you didn't

tell anyone at Hogwarts about that.

Strictly speaking I'm not supposed to

do magic.

HARRY

OK

HAGRID

We're a bit behind schedule. Best be

off. Unless you'd rather stay, of course.

- - - -

HARRY

All students must be equipped with a

one standard size two pewter cauldron,

and may bring, if they desire, either

an owl, a cat, or a toad. Can we find

all this in London?

HAGRID

If you know where to go.

TOM (BARTENDER)

Ah, Hagrid the usual I presume.

HAGRID

No thanks Tom, I'm on official Hogwarts

business. Just helping young Harry buy

his school business.

TOM

Bless my soul, it's Harry Potter.

OTHER

Welcome back Mr. Potter welcome back.

DORIS

Doris Crockford, Mr. Potter. I can't

believe I'm meeting you at last.

QUIRRELL

Harry P-p-potter. C-can't tell you how

p-pleased I am to meet you.

HAGRID

hello, professor I didn't see you there.

Harry Professor Quirrell will be your

defense Against the Dark Arts teacher.

HARRY

Oh, nice to meet you,

QUIRRELL

A fearfully fascinating subject. N-not

that you need it, eh, P-potter?

HAGRID

Yes, well must be going now. Lots to

buy.

HARRY

Good bye.

HAGRID

See, Harry? You're famous.

HARRY

But why am I famous Hagrid? All those

people back there how is it they know

who I am?

HAGRID

I'm not exactly sure I'm the right person

to tell you that, Harry. Welcome Harry,

to Diagon Alley. That's where you get

your quills and ink. Over there, all

your bits and bobs for doing wizardry.

OTH

It's a world class racing broom.

OTH

Wow! Look at it the new Nimbus 2000!

It's the fastest model yet!

HARRY

But Hagrid how am I to pay for all this?

I haven't any money.

HAGRID

Well there's your money Harry! Gringotts,

the wizard bank! Ain't no safer place,

not one! 'Cept perhaps Hogwarts.

HARRY

Hagrid what exactly are these things?

HAGRID

They're goblins Harry. Clever as they

come the goblins, but not the most friendly

of beasts. Best stay close. Mr. Harry

Potter wishes to make a withdrawal

GOBLIN

And does Mr. Harry Potter have his key?

HAGRID

Wait a minute. Got it here somewhere.

Ha! There's the little devil. Oh, and

there's something else as well. Professor

Dumbledore gave me this. It's about

You- Know- What in vault you know which.

GOBLIN

Very well.

GRIPHOOK

Vault 687. Lamp please. Key, please

HAGRID

Didn't think your mum and dad would

leave you with nothing now did you?

GRIPHOOK

Vault 713.

HARRY

What's in there Hagrid?

HAGRID

Can't tell you Harry. Hogwarts business.

Very secret.

GRIPHOOK

Stand back.

HAGRID

Best not to mention this to anyone Harry.

HARRY

I still need... a wand.

HAGRID

A wand? Well, you want Ollivander's.

There ain't no place better. Why don't

you run along and wait. I got one more

thing to do. Won't be long.

HARRY

Hello? Hello?

OLLI

I wondered when I'd be seeing you Mr.

Potter. It seems only yesterday that

you mother and father were in here buying

their first wands. Here we are. Well

give it a wave. Apparently not. Perhaps

this. NO, no definitely not. No matter.

I wonder... Curious... very curious

HARRY

Sorry but what's curious

OLLI

I remember every wand that I've sold

Mr. Potter, every one. It so happens

that the phoenix whose tail feather

resides in your wand, gave another feather.

Just one other. It is curious that you

should be destined for this wand when

its brother gave you that scar.

HARRY

And who owned that wand?

OLLI

We do not speak his name. The wand chooses

the wizard Mr. Potter. It is not always

clear why. But I think it is clear that

we can expect great things from you.

After all, He- Who-Must-Not-Be-Named

did great things. Terrible, yes, but

great.

HAGRID

Harry! Harry! Happy Birthday!

HARRY

Woah!

HAGRID

You all right Harry? You seem very quiet.

HARRY

He killed my parents didn't he? The

one who gave me this. You know Hagrid.

I know you do.

HAGRID

First and understand this Harry because

it's very important. Not all wizards

are good. Some of them go bad. A few

years ago one of them went as bad as

you can go. His name was V--. His name

was V--.

HARRY

Well maybe if you wrote it down?

HAGRID

Naw I can't spell it. All right, Voldemort.

HARRY

Voldemort?

HAGRID

Shh. It was dark times Harry, dark times.

Voldemort started to gather some followers.

Brought them over to the Dark Side.

Anyone who stood up to him ended up

dead. Your parents fought against him.

Nobody lived once he decided to kill

them. Nobody, not one. Except you.

HARRY

Me? Voldemort tried to kill me?

HAGRID

Yes. That ain't no ordinary cut on your

forehead Harry. A mark from that only

comes from being touched by a curse,

an evil curse at that.

HARRY

What happened to V--... To You-Know- Who?

HAGRID

Well some say he died. Codswallop in

my opinion. Nope, I reckon he's out

there still too tired to carry on. But

one thing's absolutely certain. Something

about you stumped him that night. That's

why you're famous. That's why everybody

knows your name. You're the boy who

lived.

HAGRID

Well some say he died. Codswallop in

my opinion. Nope, I reckon he's out

there still too tired to carry on. But

one thing's absolutely certain. Something

about you stumped him that night. That's

why you're famous. That's why everybody

knows your name. You're the boy who

lived.

- - - -

HAGRID

What are you looking at? Blimey is that

time? Sorry Harry, but I'm gonna have

to leave you. Dumbledore would be wanting

his... Well, he'd be wanting to see

me. Now, your train leaves in 10 minutes.

Here's your ticket. Stick to it Harry,

that's very important. Stick to you

ticket.

HARRY

Platform 9 ? But, Hagrid, there must

be a mistake. This says Platform 9 ?

There's no such thing. Is there?

OTH

Sorry.

HARRY

Excuse me! Excuse me!

OTH

On your left.

HARRY

Excuse me sir. Can you tell me where

I might find Platform 9 ?

OTH

9 ? Think you're being funny do you?

MRS. WEASLEY

It's the same every year packed with

Muggles of course. Come on!

HARRY

Muggles?

MRS. WEASLEY

Platform 9 ?this way! All right Percy

you first. Fred you next.

GEORGE WEASLEY

He's not Fred I am!

FRED WEASLEY

Honestly, woman you call yourself our

mother!

MRS. WEASLEY

I'm sorry George.

FRED WEASLEY

Only joking! I am Fred.

HARRY

Excuse me! Could you tell me how to...

MRS. WEASLEY

How to get on to the platform? Yes,

not to worry dear, it's Ron's first

time to Hogwarts as well. Now, all you

have to do is walk straight at the wall

between platforms 9 and 10. Best do

it at a run if you're nervous.

GINNY

Good luck!

- -

RON WEASLEY

Excuse me, do you mind? Every where

else is full.

HARRY

Not at all.

RON WEASLEY

I'm Ron by the way! Ron Weasley.

HARRY

I'm Harry. Harry Potter.

RON WEASLEY

SO it's true! DO you really have the...

the...

HARRY

The what?

RON WEASLEY

The scar?

HARRY

Oh!

RON WEASLEY

Wicked!

OTH

Anything off the trolley dears?

RON WEASLEY

No, thanks, I'm all set.

HARRY

We'll take the lot!

RON WEASLEY

Woah!

HARRY

Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans?

RON WEASLEY

They mean every flavor! There's chocolate,

peppermint and also, spinach liver,

and tripe. George sweared he got boogie

flavored one once.

HARRY

These aren't real frogs are they?

RON WEASLEY

It's just a spell. But it's the cards

you want. Each pack's got a famous witch

or wizard. I got about 500 me self.

Watch it! That's rotten luck. They've

only got one good jump in them to begin

with.

HARRY

I've got Dumbledore!

RON WEASLEY

I've got about 6 of him.

HARRY

Hey, he's gone!

RON WEASLEY

Well you can't expect him to hang around

all day, can you? This is Scabbers by

the way. Pathetic isn't he?

HARRY

Just a little bit.

RON WEASLEY

Fred gave me a spell to turn him yellow.

Want to see?

HARRY

Yeah!

RON WEASLEY

Ahem... Sunshine...

HERMIONE

has anyone seen a toad? A boy named

Neville's has one.

RON WEASLEY

No.

HERMIONE

Oh are you doing magic? Let's see then.

RON WEASLEY

Ahem. Sunshine Daisies Butter Mellow

Turn this stupid fat rat yellow.

HERMIONE

Are you sure that's a real spell? Well,

it's not very good is it? Of course,

I've only tried a few simple ones myself

but they've all worked for me. For example:

Oculus Reparo. That's better isn't it?

Holy cricket! You're Harry Potter! I'm

Hermione Granger. And you are...?

RON WEASLEY

I'm Ron Weasley.

HERMIONE

Pleasure. You two better change into

your robes. I expect we'll be arriving

soon. You've dirt on your nose by the

way. Just there.

HAGRID

Right then. First years this way, please!

First years, don't be shy. Come on now,

hurry up! Hello Harry!

HARRY

Hi Hagrid!

RON WEASLEY

Woah!

HAGRID

Right, then. This way to the boats.

Come on now, follow me.

RON WEASLEY

Wicked!

- - - -

MCGONAGALL

Welcome to Hogwarts. Now, in a few moments

you will pass through these doors and

join your classmates. But before you

take your seats, you must be sorted

into your houses. They are Gryffindor,

Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin.

Now while you're here your house will

be like your family. Your triumphs will

earn you points. Any rule breaking and

you will loose points. At the end of

the year, the houses with the most points

is awarded the house cup.

NEVILLE

Trevor! Sorry.

MCGONAGALL

The Sorting Ceremony will begin momentarily.

DRACO MALFOY

It's true then, what they're saying

on the train. Harry Potter has come

to Hogwarts.

N & OTH

Harry Potter?

DRACO MALFOY

This is Crabbe and Goyle. And I'm Malfoy.

Draco Malfoy. Think my name's funny

do you? No need to ask yours. Red hair

and a hand-me-down robe? You must be

a Weasley. You'll soon find out that

some wizarding families are better than

others, Potter. You don't want to making

friends with the wrong sort. I can help

you there.

HARRY

I think I can tell the wrong sort for

my self thanks.

MCGONAGALL

We're ready for you. Follow me.

HERMIONE

It's not real the ceiling. It's just

bewitched to look like the night outside.

I read about it in Hogwarts, A History.

MCGONAGALL

Will you wait along here please. Now

before we begin, Professor Dumbledore

would like to say a few words.

DUMBLEDORE

I have a few start-of-term notices I

wish to announce. The first years please

note, that the Dark Forest is strictly

forbidden to all students. Also, our

caretaker, Mr. Filch, has asked me to

remind you that the third floor corridor

on the right hand side is out of bounds

to all who do not wish to die a most

painful death. Thank you.

MCGONAGALL

When I call your name you will come

forth, I shall place the Sorting Hat

on your head, and you will be sorted

into your houses. Hermione Granger!

HERMIONE

Oh, no. OK relax.

RON WEASLEY

Mental that one, I'm telling you.

SHARRY

Ah, right then. Hum... Right. Okay,

Gryffindor!

MCGONAGALL

Draco Malfoy!

SHARRY

Slytherin!

RON WEASLEY

There's no witch or wizard who went

bad who wasn't in Slytherin.

MCGONAGALL

Susan Bones!

HARRY

Ow!

RON WEASLEY

Harry what is it?

HARRY

Nothing. Nothing, I'm fine

SHARRY

...where shall I put you? Let's see...

I know! Hufflepuff!

MCGONAGALL

Ronald Weasley!

SHARRY

Ha! Another Weasley! I know just what

to do with you... Gryffindor!

MCGONAGALL

Harry potter

SHARRY

Hmmm... Difficult, very difficult. Plenty

of courage, I see. Not a bad mind either.

There's talent, oh yes, and a thirst

to prove yourself. But where to put

you...

HARRY

Not Slytherin, not Slytherin!

SHARRY

Not Slytherin eh? Are you sure? You

could be great you know. It's all herein

your head. And Slytherin will help you

on the way to greatness, there's no

doubt about that. No? (Harry whispering:

Please, Please anything but Slytherin,

anything but Slytherin.) Well if you're

sure, better be... Gryffindor!

MCGONAGALL

Your attention please.

DUMBLEDORE

Let the feast begin!

HARRY

Wow!

SFRED WEASLEY

I'm half and half. Me dad's a Muggle,

mam's a witch. Bit of a nasty shock

for him when he found out!

HARRY

Say Percy, who's that teacher talking

to Professor Quirrell?

PERCY

Oh, Professor Snape, head of Slytherin

house.

HARRY

What's he teach?

PERCY

Potions. But everyone knows it's the

Dark Arts he fancies. He's been after

Quirrell's job for years.

RON WEASLEY

Ah!

SIR NEVILLE

Hello! How are you? Welcome to Gryffindor.

OTH

It's the Bloody Baron!

PERCY

Hello, Sir Nicholas. Have a nice summer?

SIR NEVILLE

Dismal. Once again my request to join

the Headless Hunt has been denied.

RON WEASLEY

I know you. You're Nearly Headless Nick.

SIR NEVILLE

I prefer Sir Nicholas if you don't mind.

HERMIONE

headless?

SIR NEVILLE

Like this.

RON WEASLEY

Ah!

- - - -

PERCY

Gryffindors, follow me, please. Keep

up. Thank-you.

OTH

Ravenclaw follow me. This way.

PERCY

This is the most direct part to the

dormitories. Oh, and keep an eye on

the staircases, they like to change.

Keep up please, and follow me. Quickly

now, come on. Come on.

OTH

That picture's moving!

OTH

Look at that one.

OTH

I think she fancies you.

OTH

Look, look!

OTH

Who's that girl?

WALL PICTURE

Welcome to Hogwarts!

THE FAT LADY

Password?

PERCY

Caput Draconis. Follow me, everyone.

Keep up. Quickly, come on! Gather around

here. Welcome to the Gryffindor common

room. Boys' dormitories is upstairs

and down to your left. Girls the same

on your right. You'll find all your

belonging have already been brought

up.

- - - -

RON WEASLEY

Whew! We made it! Can you imagine the

look on McGonagall's face if we were

late? That was bloody brilliant!

MCGONAGALL

Thank-you for that assessment Mr. Weasley.

Perhaps it would be more useful if I

transfigured Mr. Potter and yourself

into a pocket watch. That way one of

you might be on time.

HARRY

We got lost.

MCGONAGALL

Then perhaps a map? I trust you don't

need one to find your seats.

SEVERUS SNAPE

There will be no foolish wand-waving

or silly incantations in this class.

As such, I don't expect many of you

to appreciate the subtle science and

exact art that is potion making. However,

for those select few who possess the

predisposition. I can teach you how

to bewitch the mind and ensnare the

senses. I show you how to bottle fame,

brew glory, and even put a stopper in

death. Then again maybe some of you

have come to Hogwarts in possession

of abilities so formidable that you

feel confident enough to not pay attention.

Mr. Potter, our new celebrity. Tell

me what would I get if I added root

of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood?

You don't know? Well let's try again.

Where Mr. Potter would you look if I

asked you to find me a bezoar?

HARRY

I don't know, sir.

SEVERUS SNAPE

And what is the difference between monkswood

and wolfsbane?

HARRY

I don't know sir.

SEVERUS SNAPE

Pity. Clearly fame isn't everything.

Is it Mr. Potter?

SFRED WEASLEY

Eye of rabbit, harp sting hum, turn

this water into rum... Eye of rabbit

harp sting hum, turn this water into

rum.

HARRY

What's Seamus trying to do to that glass

of water?

RON WEASLEY

Turn it to rum. Actually he managed

to make weak tea yesterday, before---

Ah, mail's here.

HARRY

Can I burrow this? Thanks.

OTH

Hey look! Neville's got a Remembrall.

HERMIONE

I've read about those. When the smoke

turns red it means you've forgotten

something.

NEVILLE

The only problem is I can't remember

what I have forgotten.

HARRY

Hey Ron, somebody broke into Gringotts.

Listen:

Dark wizards or witches unknown, Gringotts

goblins were acknowledging the breach

insist nothing was taken. The vault

in question number 713 had been emptied

earlier that very same day.

odd. That's the vault Hagrid and I went

to.

- - - -

MHARRY

Good afternoon, class.

OTHS

Good afternoon Madame Hooch.

MHARRY

Good afternoon Amanda, good afternoon.

Welcome to your first flying lesson.

Well what are you waiting for? Everyone

step up to the left side of their broomstick.

Come on now, hurry up. Stick your right

hand over the broom and say up.

H & OTHS

Up! Up!

HARRY

Woah!

DRACO MALFOY

Up.

RON WEASLEY

Up. Up!

MHARRY

With feeling!

HERMIONE

Up. Up! Up. Up!

RON WEASLEY

UP! Ow! Shut up Harry.

MHARRY

Now once you've got hold of your broom,

I want you to mount it. Grip it tight.

You don't wanna be sliding off the end.

When I blow my whistle, I want each

of you to kick off from the ground,

hard. Keep your broom steady, hover

for a moment, then lean forward slightly

and touch back down. On my whistle.

Three, two... Mr. Longbottom. Mr. Mr.

Mr. Longbottom!

OTHS

Down! Down!

HARRY

Neville!

NEVILLE

Help! Help!

MHARRY

Come back down this instant! Mr. Longbottom!

Everyone out of the way!

HERMIONE

Is he alright?

NEVILLE

Ow!

MHARRY

Oh oh oh. Oh dear, it's a broken wrist.

Poor boy. Come on now, up you get. Everyone

is to keep their feet firmly on the

ground while I take Mr. Longbottom to

the hospital wing. Understand? If I

see a single broom in the air the one

riding it will find themselves out of

Hogwarts before they can say

DRACO MALFOY

Did you see his face? If the fat lump

had given this a squeeze he would remember

to fall on his fat arse.

HARRY

Give it here Malfoy.

DRACO MALFOY

No, I think I'll leave it somewhere

for Longbottom to find. How about on

the roof? What's the matter Potter?

Bit beyond you reach?

HERMIONE

Harry! No way! You heard what Madame

Hooch said. Besides you don't even know

how to fly! What an idiot!

HARRY

Give it here Malfoy or I'll knock you

off your broom!

DRACO MALFOY

Is that so? Have it your way, then!

OTH

Yeah!

OTH

Nice going, Harry!

OTH

That was wicked Harry!

MCGONAGALL

Harry Potter! Follow me. You wait here.

QUIRRELL

... this is an ingredient...

MCGONAGALL

Professor Quirrell, excuse me, excuse

me could I borrow Wood for a moment,

please?

QUIRRELL

Well, yes of course.

MCGONAGALL

Potter, this is Oliver Wood. Wood I

have found you a Seeker.

- - - -

SIR NEVILLE

Have you heard Harry Potter's the new

Gryffindor Seeker. I always knew he'd

do well.

RON WEASLEY

Seeker? But first years never make the

house teams. You must be the youngest

Quidditch player in...

HARRY

A century. According to McGonagall.

FRED WEASLEY

Well dome Harry! Wood's just told us!

RON WEASLEY

Fred and George are on the team too.

Beaters.

GEORGE WEASLEY

Our job is to make sure that you don't

get bloody up too bad. Can't make any

promises of course. Rough game Quidditch.

FRED WEASLEY

Brutal! But, nobody's died in years.

Someone vanishes occasionally.

GEORGE WEASLEY

But they'll turn up in a month or two!

RON WEASLEY

Oh go on Harry! Quidditch is great.

Best game there is, and you'll be great

too!

HARRY

But I've never even played Quidditch!

What if I make a fool of myself?

HERMIONE

You won't make a fool of yourself. It's

in your blood.

RON WEASLEY

Woah! Harry, you never told me your

father was a seeker too!

HARRY

I didn't know.

- - - -

RON WEASLEY

I'm telling you, it's spooky! She knows

move about you than you do!

HARRY

Who doesn't? What's happening?

HERMIONE

The staircases change remember?

HARRY

Let's go this way.

RON WEASLEY

Before the staircase moves again. Does

anybody feel like we shouldn't be here?

HERMIONE

We're not supposed to be here. This

is the third floor. It's forbidden!

HARRY

Let's go.

HERMIONE

Flich's cat!

HARRY

Run! Quick, let's hide through that

door! It's locked!

RON WEASLEY

that's it we're done for!

HERMIONE

Oh! Move over! Alohomora! Get in!

RON WEASLEY

Alohomora?

HERMIONE

Standard Book Of Spells- Chapter 7!

FILCH

Any one here my sweet? Come on.

HERMIONE

He thinks this door is locked.

RON WEASLEY

He thinks this door is locked.

HERMIONE

It was locked.

HARRY

And for good reason.

H, R, & HERMIONE

AH!

RON WEASLEY

What do they think they're doing? Keeping

a thing like that locked up in a school?

HERMIONE

You don't use your eyes do you? Didn't

you see what it was standing on?

RON WEASLEY

I wasn't looking at its feet! I was

a bit preoccupied with its heads. Or

maybe you didn't notice... the three!

HERMIONE

It was standing on a trap door. It wasn't

there by accident. It's guarding something.

HARRY

Guarding something?

HERMIONE

That's right. Now, if you two don't

mind, I'm going to bed before either

of you come up with another clever idea

to get killed or worse... expelled.

RON WEASLEY

She needs to sort out her priorities.

- - - -

OLIVER WOOD

Quidditch is easy enough to understand.

Each team has 7 players. Three Chasers,

two Beaters, one Keeper and a Seeker,

that's you. There are three kinds of

balls. This one's called the Quaffle.

The Chasers handle the Quaffle and try

to put it through one of those three

hoops. The Keeper, that's me, defends

the hoops. With me so far?

HARRY

I think so. What are those?

OLIVER WOOD

You better take this. Careful now, it's

coming back. Not bad Potter, you'd make

a fair Beater. Uh-oh.

HARRY

What was that?

OLIVER WOOD

Bludgers. Nasty little buggers. But

you are a Seeker. The only thing I want

you to worry about is this, the Golden

Snitch.

HARRY

I like this ball.

OLIVER WOOD

Eh, you like it now. But it's wicked

fast and damn near impossible to see.

HARRY

What do I do with it?

OLIVER WOOD

You catch it. Before the other team's

Seeker. You catch this the game's over.

You catch this, Potter, and we win.

HARRY

Woah!

- - - -

PROFESSOR FLITWICK

One of a wizard's most rudimental skill

is levitation or the ability to make

objects fly. Do you all have your feathers?

Good. Now don't forget the nice wrist

movement we've been practicing. Hum!

The

Wingardium Leviosa. Off you go then!

OTHS

Wingardium Leviosa; Wingardium Leviosa!

RON WEASLEY

Wingardium Leviosa!

HERMIONE

No, stop stop stop! You're going to

take someone's eye out! Besides, you're

saying it wrong. It's Levi-o-sa, not

Leviosar.

RON WEASLEY

You do it then if you're so clever.

Go on, go on!

HERMIONE

Wingardium Leviosa.

PROFESSOR FLITWICK

Oh oh! Well done! See here everyone,

Miss Granger's done it! Ho ho! Splendid!

SFRED WEASLEY

Wingard- Leviosa; Wingard-- Leviosa

PROFESSOR FLITWICK

Well done dear. OH!

HARRY

I think we're going to need another

feather over here professor.

RON WEASLEY

a nightmare honestly! It's no wonder

she hasn't got any friends!

HARRY

I think she heard you.