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Dear
son...
孩子…
The day that you see me old
and I am already not
,
have
patience and
try to understand me
…
<
/p>
哪天你看到我日渐老去,身体也渐渐不行,请耐着性子试着了解我……
If I get dirty when eating… if I cannot
dress… have patience.
如果我吃的脏兮兮,如果我不会穿衣服……有耐性一点……
Remember the hours I spent teaching it
to you.
你记得我曾花多久时间教你这些事吗
?
If
,
when I speak
to you
,
I repeat the same
things thousand and one
times…
如果,当我一再重复述说
Do not
interrupt me… listen to me
同样的事情…不要打断我,听我说….
When
you
were
small
,
I
had
to
read
to
you
thousand
and
one
times
the
same story until you get
to sleep…
你小时候,我必须一遍又一遍的读着同样的故事,直到你静静
睡着……..
When I do not want to have
a shower
,neither shame me nor scold
me…
当我不想洗澡,不要羞辱我也不要责骂我……
Remember when I had to chase you with
thousand excuses I invented
,
in order that you wanted to
bath…
你记得小时后我曾编出多少理由,只为了哄你洗澡…..
When
you
see
my
ignorance
on
new
technologies…
give
me
the
necessary
time and not look
at me with your mocking smile…
当你看
到我对新科技的无知,给我一点时间,不要挂着嘲弄的微笑看着我
I
taught
you
how
to
do
so
m
any
things…
to
eat
good,
to
dress
well…
to
confront life…
我曾教了你多少事情啊….如何好好的吃,好好的穿…如何面
对你的生
命……
When at some
moment I lose the memory or the thread of our
conversation…
如果交谈中我忽然失忆不知所云,
let me have the
necessary time to remember…
给我一点时间回想…
and if I cannot
do it
,
如果我还是无能为力,
do not become
nervous…
请不要紧张…..
as
the most important thing is not my conversation
but surely to be
with you and to have
you listening to me…
对我而言重要的不是对话,而是能
跟你在一起,和你的倾听…..
The
Pennsylvania-landscape
was
in
severe
wintry
garb
as
our
car
sped
westover
the interstate Ul The season was wrong, butI
couldn't get
bluebirds outof my head.
Only
three
weeks
before,
at
Christmas,
Dad
had
given
me
a
nesting
box
he'dmade:
He
had
a
special
feeling
for
the
brilliant
creatures,
and
each
spring heeagerly
awaited their return. Now I wondered, will he ever
see
one again?
It was a heart attack.
Dad's third.
When
I
got
to
the
hospital
at
2
a.m., he
was
losing
the
fight.
As
the
familyhovered at his bedside, he
drifted in and out of consciousness.
Once he looked
up sitting beside the bed holding his hand.
me
to
let
go,
he
said,
':but
I
can't.
I
don't
want
to.
patted
his arm.
The next morning the
cardiologist met us in the waiting room.
stillfighting,
doaor
said.
never
seen
such
strengthMy
youngest
brother
was
only
five
when
Ileft
home
30
years
ago.
Relation-ships
between
my brothers- and
sisters had become -frayed because of dis-tance
and
commitments to our own families.
But Dad needed his childrennow, so we
stayed at the hospital. During the long
vigil, we reminisced aboutour
years at
home.
A miner, Dad had not had an easy life.
He and Mom raised six kids at
a
timewhen coal miners eamed as little as 25 cents a
ton, and he loaded
nine tonsa day. Even
now, I'm sure we don't know most of the sacrifices
they madefor us.
I remembered
Dad's hard hat,
its carbide
lamp showing a
fine pall of
coaldust. Dad's graygreen eyes seemed
large and wise as an owl's in his
black-ened face. They often sparkled
with devilment when they met yours
inconversation. .
Each evening he
came home, eager to take up his crosscut saw or
clawhammer.
Dad
could
chock
a
piece
of
walnut
on
his
lathe
and
deffly
tum
outa beautiful salad bowl for
Mom. He
could build a
cherry fold-top desk
withfine,
dovetailed
drawers
as
easily
as
he
could
fashion
a
fishing-line
threaderout of
an old ballpoint pen.
Dad bought our plain, two-
story house from the coal company and
immedi~ately began to remodel it. Our
house was the first on the hill to
have
anindoor
bathroom
and
hot
water.
He
spent
one
summer
digging
out
the
clay-
filled foundation to install a coal furnace. We
children no longer
shivered inour bed-
rooms on cold winter mornings.
We
loved
to
watch
him
work.
When
Dad
needed
something,
we
ran
to
getit.
If
we
called
it
a
he
would
say,
a
nail
set
(thetool
for
sinking the head of a nail below the surface of
the wood).
aname. Use
it.
expeaed
the
samefrom
all
six
children.
Each
job
had
its
claim
on
your
best
efforts.
And
evertool
had
its
name.
Those
were
his
principles,
and
we
lived
by them just aSDad did.
His playful
spirit would set us to giggling-like the time he
was
buildingfireplace in the back yard.
He sent us to look for the
I'll
have
to
bend
theiamyself,
he
said
when
we
retumed
empty-handed.
We
saw the sparkle s, and
knew we'd been had.
Sitting
in
the
hospitalwaitting
room,
I
thought
back
to
an
afteon
in
Dad'sworkshop
several
years
ago..He
was
retired
by
then,
but
he
kept
busy
building beautiful
furniture, now for his children's homes. A
volunteer
naturalist,I was eager to
tell him about the help bluebirds needed.
When
the
early
settlers
had
cleared
forests
for
farmland,
I
explained,
blueLbirds
flourished, nesting in fence-posts and orchard
trees. But
their
habitatwas
disappearing,
and
now
the
birds
needed
nesting
boxesDad
listened
as-I
spoke,
his
hands
gently
moving
a
finegrained
sand-paperover
a
piece
of
oak.
I
asked
him
if
he
would
like
to
build
a
box.
He
said
hewould
think about it.
Several weeks later he
invited me into his workshop. There, on his
workbench,sat
three
well-crafted
bluebird
nesting
boxes.
the
birds
willlike themT'
he asked.
thenext spring bluebirds
nested in his yard. He was hooked.
Dad became
quite an expert on the species. Bluebirds, he
would say,
areharbingers of hope and
triumph, renowned for family loyalty. A pair
willhave
two
or
three
broods
a
year,
the
earlier
young
sometimes
helping
to feedthe later
nestlings.
The presence of his children must have
boosted Dad's spirits after
his
attackbecause he grew stronger and left the
hospital on Valentine's
Day
WhenI
visited
my
parents
at
the
end
of
March,
Dad
was
confined
to
the
downstairs.
But I noticed
that he
paused
longer and longer at the windows facing
theback
yard.
I
knew
what
he
was
hoping
to
see.
And
one
day
a
bright
flash
ofcolor circled the
nesting box closest to our house.
it's
about
time
the
rascals
showed,
don't
you
think?
Dad
said.
Sporting a resplendent blue head, back,
wings and tail, a male
bluebird sanghis
courtship song so passionately that we dubbed him
nesting
box.
Caruso
foundanother
in
the
field
below
the
yard.
He
circled
the
new box, singing feverishly.
She remained
aloof on a distant perch.
Dad was walking more and
more each day as the love story unfolded.
Icould see strength coming back into
his wiry frame.
One
day
Caruso
battled
a
rival
for
the
female's
attentions.
Then
she
foughtan
even more vehement battle with another female.
Afterward she
resumedher haughty.
stance while he fervently continued with his
rapturous repertoire.
Suddenly one
exquisite morning, when the sky mirrored Caruso's
courtingraiment,
she
flew
back
to
the
box
nearest
the
house
and
inspected
itthoroughly.
Caruso hovered nearby and sang blissfully as she
finally
acceptedhim.
Shortly
thereafter
she
proceeded
to
lay
one
egg
a
day
until
there
were
six.
Caruso
fluttered outside, defending the nest while she
incubated.
Dad was now well enough to go outside,
but he still couldn't reach
the back-
yard. He asked us to check inside the nesting box
once a day.
When
we'dreturn,
the
questions
came.
she
on
the
nest?
he
asked.
the eggshatched? Did you see
that showboat what's-his-
name?
Dad,
flected the devilment that
had returned to his eyes.
When the eggs hatched, we
marveled at the herculean efforts Caruso
andhis mate expended to capture insects
for their brood. Nestlings must
be
fedevery 20 minutes.
Near the end of May, the
fledglings left the nest. By then Dad was
able towalk to the fields beyond and
see what other bluebird news there
might be.
Mom
and
I
would
watch
him
from
the
kitchen
window.
gave
some-thing
to
those
bluebirds,
she
said
quietly
one
day.
they've
given
itback.
蓝知更鸟的希望
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