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TED
英语演讲：这才是爱情应有的样子
今天小
编为大家收集整理了关于
TED
英语演讲：
这才是爱情应有的样
子
,
希望大家
会喜欢
,
同时也希望给你们带来一些参考的作用
!
A better
way to talk about love
OK, so today I want to talk about how
wetalk about love.
And
specifically,
I
want
to
talk
about
what
’
s
wrong
with
howwe
talk about love.
今天我想谈谈我们是如何谈论爱情的。我尤其想和你们聊的是
,
我们谈论爱情时到底哪里出错了。
Most of us will
probably fall in love a fewtimes over the
course
of
our
lives,
and
in
the
English
language,
this
metaphor,falling,
is
really
the
main
way
that
we
talk
about
that
experience. I
don
’
tknow about you, but
when I conceptualize
this metaphor,
what I picture isstraight out of a cartoon
—
like
there
’
s
a
man,
he
’
s
walking
down
the
sidewalk,
withoutrealizing
it, he crosses over an open manhole, and he
just plummets into thesewer below. And
I picture it this way
because falling
is not jumping. Fallingis accidental,
it
’
s
uncontrollable.
It
’
s
something
that
happens
to
us
withoutour
consent.
And
this
—
this
is
the
main
way
we
talk
about
starting
a
new relationship.
< br>我们大多数人在一生中可能深爱过几次
,
在英语中
,
坠入爱河这
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档
个比喻
,
是我们谈论这段经历的主要方式。我不知道你是怎么想的
,
但是
当我把这个比喻概念化的时候
,
我脑海里浮现的是一幅漫画——
就像有一个人
,
他走在人行道上
,
没有意识到自己走过一个打开的井
盖
,
然后他就一头栽进下面的下水道里。
我会这
么想是因为
,
坠落不是
跳跃。
坠落是偶然的
,
是无法控制的。
是没经过我们的同意就发生了
,
而这我们说到开始一段
新的感情
,
主要就用的这种方式去表达的。
I
am
a
writer
and
I
’
m
also
an
Englishteacher,
which
means
I think about words
for a living. You could say that I getpaid
to argue that the language we use
matters, and I would like to
argue
thatmany of the metaphors we use to talk about
love
—
maybe even
most ofthem
—
are a problem.
我是一名作家
,
同时也是一位英语老师
,
这就意
味着我以思考语
言为生。
你可能会说
,
我们使用的语言很重要
,
我认为我们用
来谈论爱
情的许多隐喻——甚至可能是其中的大多数都是有问题的。
So,
in
love,
we
fall.
We
’
re
struck.
We
arecrushed.
We
swoon.
We
burn
with
passion.
Love
makes
us
crazy,
and
it
makes
ussick.
Our
hearts ache, and then they break. So our metaphors
equate
theexperience
of
loving
someone
to
extreme
violence
or
illness.
于是
,
我们
坠入爱河。我们被击溃。我们意乱情迷。爱让我们疯
狂
,
也让我们难受不已。
我们的心会痛
,
会心碎。
所以我们把深爱某人
比喻为与极端暴力
和疾病相关的比喻。
They do. And they position us as
thevictims of unforeseen
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and
totally
unavoidable
favorite
one
ofthese
is
“
smitten,
”
which
is
the
past
participle
of
the
word
”
smite.
”
And
if you look this word up in the dictionary
—
you
will
seethat
it
can
be
defined
as
both
“
grievous
affliction,
”
and,
“
tobe
very
much
in
love.
”
I
tend
to
associate the word
“
< br>smite
”
witha very
particular context,
which is the Old
Testament. In the Book of Exodusalone, there
are
16
references
to
smiting,
which
is
the
word
that
the
Bibleuses for the vengeance of an angry
God.
确实是这样的。
这些比喻把我们看作在不可预见和完全不可避免
的情况的受害者。我最
喜欢的一个是
smitten,
它是
s
mite
的过去分
词如果你在字典里查这个词
< br>-
你会发现它既可以被定义为“极度痛
苦”,也可以被定
义为“神魂颠倒”。
我倾向于把”
smite
< br>”这个词和
一个非常特殊的语境联系起来
,
那就是
《旧约》
。
仅在
《出埃及记》
中
,
就有
16
处提到了
smiting,<
/p>
这是圣经中用来描述愤怒的上帝复仇的
词。
(Laughter)
Here we are
using the same word to talkabout love that we
use
to
explain
a
plague
of
?So,
how
did
thishappen?
How
have
we
come
to
associate
love
with
great
pain
and
suffering?Andwhy
do
we
talk
about
this
ostensibly
good
experience
as
if
we
are
victims?These
are
difficult
questions,
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but I have some theories. And to think
thisthrough, I want to
focus on one
metaphor in particular, which is the idea oflove
as madness.
我们谈论爱情时所使用的词语和我们用来解释蝗虫的瘟疫所用
的词语是
同一个。对吧
?
那么
,
怎么会这样呢
?
我们是为什么会把爱和
巨大的痛苦联系在一起呢
?
为什么我们谈论这种看似美
好的经历时将
自己看做受害者呢
?
这些
问题很难回答
,
但我有一些理论。
为了
深入思
考这个问题
,
我想特别关注一个
比喻
,
那就是爱是疯狂的想法。
When I first
started researching romanticlove, I found
these
madness
metaphors
everywhere.
The
history
of
Westernculture
is
full
of
language
that
equates
love
to
mental
illness. These are justa few examples.
William Shakespeare:
“
Love
is
merely
a
madness,
”
from
”
As
You
Like
It.
”
Friedrich
Nietzsche:
“
There
is always somemadness in
love.
”
“
Got me
looking,
got me looking so crazy in love
—
“
fromthe great
philosopher, Beyoncé
Knowles.
当我第一次开始研究浪漫爱情时
,
我发现这些疯狂的
隐喻无处不
在。
西方文化史上充满了将爱情等同于精神疾病的语
言。
这只是几个
例子。莎士比亚:“爱只不过是一种疯狂”,出
自《皆大欢喜》
。尼
采:“爱情总有疯狂的时刻。”伟大的哲学
家碧昂丝·诺尔斯曾说
过:“让我看起来疯狂
,
像是爱疯了”
I fell in love for the first time when
Iwas 20, and it was
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a
pretty
turbulent
relationship
right
from
the
start.
And
itwas
long
distance
for
the
first
couple
of
years,
so
for
me
that
meant
very
highhighs
and very
low
lows.
I
can
remember
one moment
in
particular.
I
was
sittingon
a
bed
in
a
hostel
in
South
America,
and I was watching the person I
lovewalk out the door. And it
was
late,
it
was
nearly
midnight,
we
’
d
gotten
into
anargument
over dinner, and
when we got back to our room, he threw his
things
inthe
bag
and
stormed
out.
While
I
can
no
longer
remember
what
that
argument
wasabout,
I
very
clearly
remember
how
I
felt
watching him leave.
我第一次坠入爱河是在我
20
岁的时候
,
从一开始这段关系就跌
宕起伏。在最初的几年里
,
我们处于异地恋的状态
,
所以对我来说
,
这
意味着要么极度幸福要么极度痛苦。我能特别记得那一刻
,
我坐在南
美一家旅社的床上
,
看着我爱的夺门而出。已经很晚了
,
将近午夜
了
,
我们在吃晚饭的时候发生了争吵
,
当我们回到房间时
,
他把他的东西
扔进包里
,
气冲冲地走了。虽然我已经不记
得我们当时因为什么在争
吵了
,
但我非
常清楚地记得看着他离开时我的感受。
I
was
22, it
was
my
first
time
in
thedeveloping
world,
and
I was totally alone. I
had another week until my flighthome,
and I knew the name of the town that I
was in, and the name of
the citythat I
needed to get to to fly out, but I had no idea
how
to
get
around.
I
hadno
guidebook
and
very
little
money,
and
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I
spoke no Spanish.
< br>那时我
22
岁
,
这是我第一次来到发展中国家
,
我孤身一人。还有
一个星期我才能飞回家
,
我知道我要去的城
镇的名字
,
也知道我要飞
到的城市的名
字
,
但是我不知道该怎么走。
我没有旅
游指南
,
也没有多
少钱
,
而且我不会说西班牙语。
Someone more adventurous
than me might haveseen this as a
moment
of opportunity, but I just froze. I just sat
there.
Andthen I burst into tears. But
despite my panic, some small
voice
in
my
headthought,
“
Wow.
That
was
dramatic.
I
must
really
be
doing this love thingright.
”
一些比我更有冒险精神的人可能会
把这看作是一个机遇
,
但我却
愣住了。
我只是坐在那里。然后我泪流满面。尽管我很恐慌
,
但我脑
子里还是有个很小的声音在想:“哇
!
这是
很戏剧性的
,
我真的爱上这
个人了!”
Because some part of me wanted to
feelmiserable in love.
And it sounds so
strange to me now, but at 22, I longed tohave
dramatic
experiences,
and
in
that
moment,
I
was
irrational
and
furious
anddevastated,
and
weirdly
enough,
I
thought
that
this
somehow
legitimized
thefeelings
I
had
for
the
guy
who
had
just
left me.
因为我在这一刻想要被爱折磨
,
现在听起来很奇怪
,
但在我
22
岁
的时候
,
我渴望有戏剧性的经历
,
在那一刻
,
我失去理智
,
愤怒和崩溃
,
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奇怪的是
,
我认
为这在某种程度上
,
我对那个刚摔门而去的我的男人
产生这样的感情是合理的。
I think on some level I
wanted to feel alittle bit crazy,
because
I
thought
that
that
was
how
loved
worked.
This
reallyshould not
be
surprising,
considering
that
according
to
Wikipedia, there areeight films, 14
songs, two albums and one
novel with
the title
“
CrazyLove.
”
我想在某种程度上
,
我让自己有点疯狂
,
因为我认为这才是爱一
个人的方式。这一点都不奇怪
,
毕竟维基百科上显示有
8
部电影、
14
首歌曲、两张专辑和一本名为《疯狂的爱
》的小说。
About half
an
hour
later,
he
came
back
toour
room. We
made
up.
We spent another mostly happy week traveling
then, when I got home, I thought,
“
That was so terrible and
must
be
a
real
romance.
”
I
expected
my
first
love
to
feel
likemadness,
and
of
course,
it
met
that
expectation
very
well.
But
loving
someonelike
that
—
as
if
my
entire
well-being
depended on him
loving me back
—
was notvery
good for me or
for him.
大约半小时后
,
他回来了。我们和解了。我们又一起度过了快乐
的一周
,<
/p>
一起旅行。当我回到家
,
我想
,
那真是一段又可怕又美好的一
段经历。这一定是
一段真正的罗曼史。我期待我的初恋是疯狂的
,
当
然
,
我如愿以偿了。但是爱一个人就像是我整个人的
状态感受都取决
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于他是否也爱我。这与我
,
与他而言都不是一件好
事。
But I suspect this experience of love
isnot that unusual.
Most
of
us
do
feel
a
bit
mad
in
the
early
stages
of
romanticlove.
In
fact,
there
is
research
to
confirm
that
this
is
somewhatnormal,because,
neurochemically
speaking,
romantic
love
and
mental
illness
arenot
that
easily
distinguished.
This
is true.
但我怀疑这种爱的体验并不是那么不寻常。
< br>在大多数人刚开始一
段恋情时都感到有那么一点疯狂。事实上
,
有研究证实这其实是正常
的
,<
/p>
因为从神经化学的角度来说
,
浪漫的爱情
和精神疾病并不是那么
容易区分的。
This study from 1999 used
blood tests toconfirm that the
serotonin
levels
of
the
newly
in
love
very
closely
resembledthe
serotonin
levels
of
people
who
had
been
diagnosed
with
obsessive-compulsivedisorder.
1999
年的这项研究通过血液测试证实
,
刚恋爱的人的血清素水平
与被诊断为强迫症的人的血清素水平非常相似。
Yes, and low
levels of serotonin are alsoassociated with
seasonal
affective
disorder
and
depression.
So
there
is
someevidence
that
love
is
associated
with
changes
to
our
moods
and our there are
other studies to confirm that
most
relationships begin this way.
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