Over the past few decades

Over the past few

decades, our

society’s traditional beliefs

and

assumptions

concerning

the

institution

of

marriage

have

come

under attack. Many people believe that marriage is “only a piece

of

paper”

anyway

,

and

that

it

represents

an

outdated

social

institution that is

no longer

relevant or

necessary

for regulating

intimate relationships.

Some

have

come

to

see

it

as

merely

an

optional

lifestyle

choice

—

one

that

constitutes

a

potential

threat

to

individual

fulfillment,

autonomy, independence

and growth, and

a serious

handicap

for

women,

damaging

their

health,

self-esteem

and

severely limiting their

career

prospects. Still others

believe that

promoting marriage and marital obligations only puts women at

risk for abuse and violence.

Those who can read the signs of cultural change suggest that our

generation is on the verge of becoming a post-marriage culture!

There

are

a

growing

number

of

sociologists

and

family

researchers who strongly contradict these

assertions and

myths.

They

claim

that

although

marriage

as

an

institution

has

been

weakened

by

widespread

social

change,

there

is

a

compelling

argument to be made for marriage and its

benefits to

both

men

and women.

Believers

include

Linda

Waite

and

Maggie

Gallagher,

who,

in

their

recent

publication

The

Case

for

Marriage,

systematically

outline

a

wide

range

of

scientific

research

that

provides

clear

evidence

that

being

married

is

much

better

for

you

physically,

emotionally, economically, financially, sexually and spiritually.

They show

how

marriage isn’t just

a

private relationship,

but a

social

reality

that

enhances

and

enriches

people’s

lives

and

creates a shared sense of meaning and purpose that provides the

foundation

for

emotional

and

spiritual

health.

They

show

how

through

marriage

and

family,

we

each

develop

a

sense

of

belonging

and

fulfillment

that

fulfils

our

basic

need

for

love,

trust,

loyalty,

fidelity

,

long- term

commitment

and

mutual

support.

It has clear

economic

benefits for

people with

access to

steady

jobs

and

stable

homes.

People

who

are

married

have

more

money,

and

their

money

goes

further.

They

tend

to

specialize,

exchange,

and

share

roles

and

functions

in

ways

that

generate

higher earnings, encourage savings, help their partner to restrain

from

impulse

spending,

and

generally

leave

the

family

financially

better

off.

Clearly,

married

couples

benefit

from

economies

of

scale,

where

two

people

live

more

cheaply

than

one.

Being

in

a

two-parent

family

provides

them

with

a

better

standard of living and gives them a greater sense of supervision

and

protection.

It

also

gives them twice

as

many

contact hours

with parents

and provides role models

who show them

how to

relate effectively to others. Children from intact families tend to

perform

better in

school, are more likely to stay out of trouble,

are

less

likely

to

be

abused

in

their

own

home,

and

are

less

likely to get pregnant out of wedlock.

On

the

other

hand,

children

who

come

from

divorced

homes

tend

to

be

worse

off

educationally,

financially

and

psychologically

.

They

are

frequently

subject

to

much

greater

health

risks

and

frequently

that

show

signs

of

anxiety,

depression,

intense

anger,

disruptive

behavior,

and

other

forms

of emotional distress for many years after the family has broken

up.

Kids

who

live

with

unhappy

or

highly

confliction

parents

are

still better off than kids who live with a divorced parent. While

this idea sounds illogical and quite difficult to accept, especially