-
So, Penny, we were talking to our
neighbors,
佩妮
我们跟邻居聊天
and
they're thinking of moving and selling their
house.
他们说在考虑卖掉房子搬家
Really? Why?
真的吗
为什么
Something
about babies crying
好像跟孩子哭闹
and keeping them up all night; it's not
important.
整晚睡不好觉有关
原因不重要
You guys
should totally take a look at it.
你们俩应该考虑下要不要买
Then
we could be neighbors.
那样我们就可以做邻居了
Hey.
Wait a minute, what about us?
慢着
那我们呢
I mean,
we're married now.
我们现在结婚了
Maybe we want to buy the house next
door.
也许我们想买到你们隔壁呢
Well, Amy, we can't move.
艾米
我们可不能搬家
I'd have
to change all the tags in my underwear.
不然我就得换掉我内裤上的所有标签了
You can buy new ones.
你可以买新的
What-- new
house, new underwear. What am I,
什么
换新房子
还要换新内裤
怎么
为受到威胁的证人提供新身份与住所
美国联邦司法部管理的证人保护项目
in the Witness Protection Program?
我是进了证人保护计划吗
Okay.
Guys, so what do you think?
好吧
你们怎么想
Well, I
don't know, w-we're pretty happy here.
我说不好
我们在这里住得挺好
Yeah.
Plus, if we moved,
对
再说
要是我们想搬家
we'd
probably just get a loft downtown.
可能会去市区找一间跃层式公寓
Really?
真的吗
I always figured we'd get a place with
a yard.
我一直以为我们会找个带院子的房子
Oh, sure, yeah, that makes sense,
行吧
这就说得通了
so you
could shoot hoops and mow the lawn?
那你就可以去投篮和修剪草坪了
How are you two married?
你俩是怎么结婚的
You were
there. I wore her down.
你当时在场
我磨得她烦了不得不嫁
He
did.
没错
You guys
should've talked about all this stuff
你们应该在约会的时候
while
you were dating.
就把这些都聊明白
I mean, me and Anu already know so much
about each other.
我和安奴就已经对彼此了如指掌了
Wait, I forget, is Anu your waxer?
慢着
我忘了
安奴是你的脱毛师吗
Uh, no,
that's Annette.
不是
那是安妮特
Anu is the
woman my father fixed me up with.
安奴是我爸给我介绍的相亲对象
We're going on our first date tomorrow.
明天我们就要第一次约会了
Which reminds me, I need to see
Annette.
这提醒了我
我得找安妮特脱个毛
You're
really letting your father pick out a wife?
你真的让你父亲来给你挑选妻子吗
Why not?
为什么要拒绝
Arranged marriages have been working
for thousands of years.
包办婚姻已经延续上千年了
Anu
and I come from similar backgrounds,
我和安奴出身相仿
our
families get along
我们的家庭交好
and we each filled out questionnaires,
我们还各自填了问卷
so we
know we're not wasting our time
这样就不会把时间浪费在
with
someone who's not compatible.
跟你不匹配的人身上
Oh,
that sounds so dry and clinical.
这也太枯燥死板了吧
You
lucky duck.
你这个幸运的小子
I just don't think you can truly know
someone
我只是觉得没有有对方相处过
until you've spent a lot of time with
them.
是无法真正了解一个人的
Really? What's Penny's dream vacation?
真的吗
那佩妮梦想的度假地是哪里
Malibu beach house.
马里布海景别墅
That's
Barbie's dream vacation.
那是芭比娃娃的梦想度假地
Maybe you should send us that
questionnaire.
不如你把问卷发给我们吧
Enjoying your book?
读书还开心吗
So much.
开心得要死
Why do you
keep poking at it?
你为什么要一直在书上戳戳戳
Fine, I'm shopping on my phone.
被你发现了
我在手机上购物
You're
the one who said you wanted to read more.
是你说要多读点书的
Yes, I
also tell people I only feed the kids organic.
对
我还告诉别人我只给孩子吃有机食品呢
It's just stuff you say.
随口一说罢了
Hello.
好啊
How was your
night?
玩儿得开心吗
Ah, it was great. We went to an improv
show.
挺棒的
我们去看即兴表演了
Yeah.
They asked the audience to suggest a word,
他们要观众提一个词来表演
and
they used Stuart's.
最后用了斯图尔特的
Oh,
cool, what was it?
棒
什么词
Coconuts.
椰子
It was such a
good one.
这词太妙了
It just came to me.
我灵机一动
- Uh, what
are you guys up to? - Reading.
-
你们俩在干什么
-
读书
Oh, nice, I
wish I read more.
真好
我也希望能多读点书
Well,
if it's important, you find the time.
如果读书对你很重要
那你总能挤出时间的
You
want to see my room?
你想参观下我的房间吗
-Yeah.
-
Cool.
-
好
-
好极了
How do you feel about this?
你什么感觉
That she
can clearly do better, but that's not for me to
say.
她显然能找个更好的
不过我没发言资格
No, with
them in his room, doing stuff.
不
我是说他们在里面干什么呢
Oh,
come on, we're sitting right out here.
不会的
我们就坐在外面
They're
not gonna do anything.
他们不会做什么的
I'd like
to change my answer.
我想更改答案
Wow, you really are good at this.
你真的很擅长涂指甲
Well,
I've spent a lot of time painting D&D miniatures.
我可是用了大把时间给模型上色的人
I know that makes you want to rip my
shirt off,
我知道你为此欲火焚身想扒了我的衣服
but wait until your nails are dry.
不过先等指甲干了吧
Oh,
it's Raj.
是拉杰
He
sent us that Indian marriage questionnaire.
他把那份印度婚姻问卷发来了
-
Ooh, read one.
-
Okay.
-
快念念
-
好
你对宗教有多虔诚
That's easy, both of us: not at all.
这个简单
我俩都不信教
No, I
wouldn't say not at all.
不
我不是一点都不信
I mean,
I am pretty spiritual.
我对精神洗涤很感兴趣
I do
go to yoga, so...
我会去做瑜伽
所以
...
Great, so
your church is Our Lady of the Stretchy Pants.
好
那你的教堂就是女士弹力裤
Next
question.
下一个问题
Uh,
你和家人有多亲密
Pretty close.
很亲
I'm gonna say not too close,
我觉得我家不是很亲
but I'm
hoping to get farther.
我希望再疏远些
How do
you feel about children?
你对孩子有什么看法
Um,
they're okay, I guess.
还行吧
I mean, if I saw one, I wouldn't throw
a rock at it.
我看到孩子不会对着他扔石头的
W-Why would you throw a rock at a
child?
你为什么要对一个孩子扔石头
I just said I wouldn't.
我说了我不会扔
The
question is would you like to have kids.
这问题是问你想不想要孩子
So,
yeah, we want kids.
答案是肯定的
我们想要孩子
Yeah--
someday.
好吧
以后会有的
Right,
like, in the next five years.
嗯
五年内吧
Sure, uh,
next question.
行吧
下一个问题
你跟宠物相处得好吗
Well, I did take care of Sheldon for 15
years,
我照顾了谢尔顿十五年
and he only bit me twice.
他只咬过我两次
I have to
say, uh, after reading your questionnaire,
在读了你填的问卷以后
我得说
I feel like I
already know you.
我感觉已经很了解你了
Totally. Me, too. Excuse me.
没错
我也这么觉得
服务员
Can we please
get sparkling instead of tap,
把水换成起泡酒
some
clean silverware and find out what they're having?
上点擦亮的银器餐具
再看看他们在吃什么
That
looks delicious.
看起来很美味
Yes, ma'am.
好的
女士
Thank you.
谢谢
So, you're an
astrophysicist.
这么说
你是天文物理学家
Yes,
ma'am.
是的
女士
I-I mean, uh,
just yes.
我
我是说
是的
U-Unless you
prefer
除非你想要我称你为
女
士
I don't.
不必了
Good, because
you don't seem like a ma'am.
好
因为你不像一位高傲的女士
You
seem more like a sweet thang.
而是一个小甜心
You are
not good at this.
你真的对撩妹一窍不通
Well,
if I was good at this,
要是我懂怎么撩妹
I
wouldn't need to be fixed up by my father.
又何必让我爸来给我安排相亲
I
never thought I'd let my family set me up, either,
我也从没想过我会接受家里的安排
but I'm 34, I'd like to have kids
可我已经
34
岁了
我想要孩子
and it's
hard to date because I work so much.
但我工作太忙没时间约会
Oh,
yes, uh, you're a concierge.
对了
你是酒店礼宾
For now. I
plan to be managing a hotel in the next five
years.
暂时是这样
我打算五年内自己经营一家酒店
Four, if I can get the current manager
out of the way.
要是能把现在的老板踢走
四年就能搞定
He's a
smoker, so fingers crossed.
他是个烟鬼
祝他好运
I-I get it.
You know, um, I used to have a long list
我明白
你知道吗
我以前给未来的妻子
of what
I wanted from a wife.
列过一长串的要求
of what
I wanted from a wife.
美国女演员
一头浓密棕发
曾凭影片《弱点》获奥斯卡最佳女主
Uh, eyes like Sandra Bullock,
< br>要有桑德拉
·
布洛克那样的眼睛
hair like Sandra Bullock,
桑
德拉
·
布洛克那样的秀发
and the bravery of Ryan Stone.
还要有瑞安
·
斯通那样的勇气
That's Sandra Bullock's character in
Gravity.
那是桑德拉
·
布
洛克在《地心引力》里的角色
But now,
不过现在
I-I just
want someone nice.
我只希望遇到一个性格好的
I
think I'm nice. Are you nice?
我觉得我性格很好
你呢
Oh, I'm
definitely nice.
我性格可好了
Every time a girl breaks up with me she
always starts with,
每次有姑娘跟我分手
说的第一句话都是
< br>你是个好人
Look, your whole
sweet,
听着
你很贴心
insecure
thing is cute,
你的不自信也很可爱
but honestly, I have no time for that.
但说实话
我没那么多闲工夫
If
you're not serious about this,
如果你不是认真的
you need
to walk away now.
现在就走人
I-I am serious.
我是认真的
Good.
很好
Okay.
好的
O-Okay, w-what
does this mean?
好的
这是什么意思
I think it
means I might be the future Mrs....
意思就是我可能是未来的
...
Koothrappali.
库萨帕里夫人
How would
you feel if I didn't change my name?
如果我不跟夫姓
你会有何感想
A little
hurt, but you wouldn't know, because I'm too nice.
有点受伤
但我不会告诉你
因为我是大好人
Hey, want
to get lunch?
想去吃午餐吗
I can't.
不行
Halley and Michael were up all night,
and I'm way behind here.
哈雷和迈克尔整晚没睡
我的进度完全落后了
- Oh,
no, are they sick? -
No.
-
他们病了吗
-
不是
They were just laughing and playing
like a couple of jerks.
他们只是像两个小混蛋一样边笑边玩
Boy, they're cute, but they ruin
everything.
他们是很可爱
但什么都被他们毁了
I get
that.
我明白
You
know, I've been thinking lately
最近我一直在想
that
maybe I don't want kids.
也许我不想要孩子
Are you
crazy?
你疯了吗
Of
course you want them. It's amazing.
你当然要生孩子
他们棒呆了
You just
said they ruin everything.
你刚说什么都被他们毁了
I'm
allowed to. It's their fault I pee when I laugh.
我有权利这样说
我笑的时候漏尿是他们的错
Hang
on, why is it crazy
等等
为什么我说
to say I
might not want kids?
不想要孩子就是疯了
Oh,
it's not crazy.
不是疯了
It's just wrong.
只是错了
You only
think you don't want kids,
你只是现在想着你不要孩子
but
once you have kids, you'll realize that you did
want them.
但你一旦生了孩子
你会发现其实你是想要孩子的
Or
I don't want them, so I won't have them, so back
off.
又或者我不要孩子
我就不会生孩子
你别管我
Aw, you
sound just like me before I became a mom
你这口气真像我还没有成为母亲
and learned what the meaning of love
was.
没有领悟爱的真谛的时候
Wow, I cannot believe how condescending
you're being.
不敢相信你居然一副高高在上的样子
Look, I know it's scary, but you're
gonna be a great mom.
我知道很吓人
但你会成为很好的母亲
I know
I'd be great, but the point is I don't want to be
one.
我知道
但重点是我不想当妈
Maybe
you wouldn't be great. You kind of got a temper.
也许你当不了一个好母亲
你的脾气太爆
You know,
not everyone needs to have kids to be fulfilled.
不是所有人都需要孩子来实现人生价值
You're right, you've got Leonard.
你说得对
你有莱纳德了
What more
do you need?
还需要什么孩子呢
- Hey, guys. - Hello.
-
各
位
-
你好
How was your date?
约会怎么样
Ah, let me
answer that with a question.
让我用一个问题来回答
How
would you like to be my best man?
你愿意做我的伴郎吗
Wait,
you're not seriously
慢着
你不会真要娶一个
marrying
a woman you've met once.
只见过一次的女人吧
Why
not? She's nice, I'm nice.
有何不可
她人很好
我人很好
We're just
as likely to be happy as any other two people.
我们有可能会和其他夫妻一样幸福
Maybe even happier.
也许更幸福
Sorry, that
was not a swipe at you.
抱歉
我没有针对你
I didn't
think it was.
我本来没觉得你针对我
Yeah, good, 'cause it was not.
很好
因为我没有
Well, I,
for one,
我个人来说
applaud Raj's decision to forgo
emotional attachment
为拉杰的决定喝彩
他放弃了感情束缚
and find
a life partner by bowing
通过屈服于三千年的独裁传统
to
a 3,000-year-old authoritarian tradition.
找到了人生伴侣
What are
you talking about?
你说什么呢
You married a woman you're in love
with.
你娶了自己爱的女人
I can't believe you're throwing that
back in my face.
我不敢相信你用这件事回击我
Why
can't you just be happy for me?
你为什么不能为我开心
Because you're being dumb.
因为你这样很傻
You don't
know anything about her.
你对她一点也不了解
W-Well,
how come you all get to be married
凭什么你们都结婚了
and I
have to stay single?
就我一个人单身
I think
that's a question for a licensed professional.
这问题恐怕要专业的心理咨询师才能回答
You know what, you're not just
insulting me.
知道吗
你不仅羞辱了我
Okay?
You're insulting my family, my culture
你还羞辱了我的家人
我的文化
and my
future bride, Anu,
和我未来的新娘安努
a
vegetarian with a master's degree from Cornell
她是毕业于康奈尔大学的硕士
她吃素
whose
favorite fruit is pineapple.
最爱的水果是菠萝
Now, I'm
not sure if this helps, but did you know
我不确定这话是否有帮助
但你们知道吗
that
pineapples were once so rare
菠萝曾经非常稀有
that
King Charles posed for a portrait with one?
查尔斯国王找人绘制肖像时曾让菠萝一起入画
How does that help?
这话能有什么帮助
Oh, it
helped me. I've been trying to slide that
帮了我
几年来我一直设法
into a
conversation for years.
在聊天中提起这事
Hey,
honey, how was your day?
亲爱的
今天过得好吗
What's
wrong?
怎么了
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